"Correct Grooming"

(Click to enlarge)
So today is really busy. Our trash can was stolen, so we're dealing with that. The recovery will be difficult, but... *sniff*... I'll buy another.

Now let's talk about this here Offtime, it's cute, clever, and the first Offtime I ever enhanced on the computer. So in a special way, it's the first Offtime. Seems apt that this should be the last. Like I said, my collection of Offtimes is gone, and unless I'm suddenly 9 years old again at some point, there won't be anymore. This site existed to refurbish my old work and show both the reader and myself the inner-workings of a child's sense of comedy. Looking back on this stuff, I was pleasantly surprised. I'm leaving this blog up so I can always remember the stuff I did when I was little, and then the stuff I did with that stuff when I was a teen. I'll always cherish the past, but here's to the future!
check the YouTube Channel!

50th Post! (Zelda & Company)

"At least he's straight."

It's so sad that the 50th post wasn't an actual Offtime, but I gaurantee the 100th will be! I should probably start working on a new season, but I'm swamped with channel stuff. So until everything kinda evens out, all of my blogs will slow to a halt. Anyway, on to the drawing!

They weren't actually together, I just CPed the happy fellow next to her and figured this would count as a post.
Sorry today's post was so late, here's to another 50 posts!

"Groping her tiny hands?"

Doesn't she look like she's kinda copping a feel there?

The "TG" on her shirt stands for that girl.

Since I missed last Thursday's update, I'm putting up two things this morning. The first one is a still from Disney's Pocahontas. I just had to use this when I reeeaaally noticed what was going on. The second photo today is a bit of artwork I did.  unfortunately, an appendage of hers is rather small. No you perv, it's her hands. For some reason their abnormally tiny, and I didn't notice what I did until it was finished. Side note, I've gotten way better at drawing boobs since this was made, and isn't it weird she doesn't have a pelvis?

WTG Zelda with ya' bad self!

"Ain't she just stunning!?"

This is supposed to be Zelda from the famed gaming series you might have heard of. At least this is just my version of her. This drawing is actually cropped from a rejected Offtime. Imagine Link at the other side of the page, holding a pink Triforce symbol. And he says, "Zelda, guess what!"

As you can imagine, that was canned. Partially because if you know some history, pink triangles were the sign gay people had to wear in Hitler's weird world. But mostly because, it wasn't that funny.

"What's on TV?"

I highly recommend checking it out. It's about professional wrestling, and how you could honestly view it sometimes. I'm can't remember how shocked my family must've been when I handed them a drawing of a gay kiss. The things kids think of. Took guts to make it, though. I also admire the general artwork here. I was never very good at drawing kisses, TVs, couches or heads at an angle. Could draw the male body, though...

To this day, I can't watch wrestling unless I'm specifically in the mood or something. It doesn't help knowing it's faker than latex. I really liked it. That's why I made it, and put it up here. ;)

"Horrific!"

So this Offtime is the second to last Offtime I have in stock. I'd make more, but I'm really occupied with all my other stuff. In good news, SuperMerch™ uploaded it's first new post in 2 months! And Underobs is still going strong. Oh yeah, I kinda have to describe this Offtime a little. There's a reason I waited this long to upload it. Look at it upside down, and you see a horrific scene with blood, and a stick person crying heavily over their bodies. Look at it rightside up, and the entire image resembles a happy face. Or, if you can't imagine that big, look at the head of the crying girl upside down. Her earrings are eyes, her open frown is a smile, and her stub of a nose is the underlip. And you can imagine that her tears are drool. This is probably very dark, but this is the most violent offtime to date, and hopefully not to be surpassed.

Family Guy DYNOMITE! (This vid is so funny)

"Special President Money"

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As I said, Offtime counts are depleting. And because of such, I might start uploading other things on Thursday. But It'll still be worth the tune in!

Today's offtime is almost entirely my idea, the rest of it can be credited to parSec.  The main joke was mine, but it was parsec who decided on which President to go with. I originally wanted James Buchanan for some reason. And the delivery man used to say something much worse, although, I realized that that didn't improve the humor at all.

"For Cheap Amusement!"

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So, I'm very busy. But in a fun way! I making a movie for one of my YouTube friends. Yes, she's just a friend.
But on the bad side, my Offtime collection is depleting. I'll have to start making more, and that's not something I planned on doing. Personally,

I'm really proud of myself. This Offtime used to actually be vulgar, but I figured out a way to change it so it's kiddy safe, (Oddly Appropriate) but still funny! For all of you who must know what it used to say, fine. On the chamber where it says, "The Sitter." It used to say, "Sit n' Screw." An overly crass term for doing nothing. (One of it's uses.)

"Everyone's Mother."

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Okay, I know I'm dropping the ball a little. This update came rather late in the afternoon. But I'm really trying to do alot around this time, and as I said, Summer is a difficult time for me. One day I will explain, but until then, just keep trucking.

Personally, I think this Offtime is really cute. I wanted to give it a caption, but we thought it was good by itself. If it had gotten a caption, it would have said, " By the looks of it, he's bouncing them."
Let me know if you thought that caption would've been a funny addition.

"Make a joke"

3 years ago I probably would've uploaded this with a D for suggestive language, but now, I can easily file this under Oddly Appropriate without any hesitation. The world has declined a little bit in that way...

But about this Offtime, it's cute, it's a little funny, and you click to enlarge.
Also, addressing the issue about Ian Dialian. The new episode should be up definitely before the next month.
I just need to burn through all the story I have so I can get it done. 

Your Ex Boyfriend (READ THE FULL POST!)

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So today should be fun, I'm editing a funny Sims vid I can put on my Channel, I'm getting more YouTube friends, and I finally topped 1400 total video views. (And counting of course)

This is another cute Offtime I made. I feel it symbolizes the time when
you leave someone for something new. Someone you know your parents wouldn't approve of. ...Basically, it's like leaving your boyfriend for a black guy. It's always fun for the first few days, then you get tired of it. :D

And should you see your Ex at another point in time, don't say something hurtful, but let them know...you know.

"Utter Cop-out"

I really don't have time to blog on the one, I'm in horrible leg pain so I have to keep moving. That doesn't make much sense does it? Though this Offtime fits the mood of the day, (rushed with no effort)
It was made a good while before this date. It's not even HD!

Getting off...to a good start!

Yesterday, famed writer and musician "parSec," created a Channel.
It's been styled, and he's working on videos for it as we speak.
I just wanted to say something about it here because he helps out with Offtimes & some of my videos.
It's the least I could do.

Go give him some love at his Channel, or just visit his main site. ;)

"The Hottest New Gameshow!" (S)

This Offtime has sexual references. *click to enlarge*

This one might qualify as an Offtime, it might not.
It's one both me and parSec made a long time ago. It's about stupid people who seal...important things for money. All the women who saw it of course, felt the need to inform us that female castration is an incredibly painful procedure, and in fact, shouldn't even be called a procedure because it's so barbaric and cruel. But of course after hearing that my reaction was, "Wow, that chick has it comin'!"

"At Least He's Handy"

*click to enlarge*

I like this one...
Today is gonna be busy for me. I have to make some new videos just so I have them in stock, I need to make some changes on my Channel, and I need to write the next edition of Ian Dialian.
Also, I'm hosting a small competition. Details in the sidebar.

This Offtime was an easy idea. Since I couldn't draw a hand,
I needed to trace my own. It got laughs from everyone I gave it to, but for some reason I still wish I had added more blood...

"Like us"

So, this is an HD Offtime. The shaping is different, and in my opinion, it's more recent and up to date! Most of comments are gonna be about those weirdos in the lower right corner. I just went all out to make it the weirdest group of people you've ever seen. I like the guy in the middle who appears to be drooling. Ironically, this comic site has taken a backseat, while the YouTube channel with the same name is my main interest.

Announcement for an announcement

This is in no way a replacement for an Offtime, it's just something cute I whipped up last April and I decided to post it today. Okay, it's really not a replacement for anything. I just really wanted to put something up.

"Yeah, me too."

This may barely qualify as an Offtime, simply because I neglected to put it up with a cover. Assume it's undone, or unfinished. Never to be retouched...
It's a cute gag, and it's Thursday's update. See ya next week! ;)
I'm in a hurry today.

"This Next Generation." (D)

This Offtime contains D for Dialogue. .click to enlarge.

I'm a little late getting this one up I know. I like to have them up at, or before 10:00, but some friends came over this morning and wanted to take me somewhere. Also, there have been some bugs going around. There's nothing I can do to fix them, so I hope that the higher ups can. But now to talk about this Offtime. The idea is simple, two stickmen walking through, one superior to the other in many ways. Unfortunately, he won't shut up about it. And then amazingly he builds himself up so high only to knock himself down by insulting the fellow next to him.

SuperMerch™ has ended their Spiderman March crusade, so they're not gonna be updating for a little bit. Does that mean that Offtime will be the only update made around here? Maybe...maybe not...